I’ve been thinking about many of us got the message from our families that we are way too much.
I think about this as a parent because I sometimes become overwhelmed when my kids are especially needy (and aren’t they always needy when we’re feeling extra needy ourselves?) and one more tearful episode threatens to push me over the edge.
And I think about this as a former child who was often pushing my parents over the edge with my own needy intensity.
I don’t know where we got the idea that we are all supposed to be even keeled all the live long day. Maybe one too many readings of Goldilocks gave us the illusion that “just right” is a worthy goal. In any case, most of us got the message that when we were at our most emotional — most angry, sad and even happy — that we were too much.
We apologize for crying; we worry that we’re too much