Are my child’s struggles my fault?

woman hugging boy on her lap

It’s the therapy stereotype, right? It’s always the parents’ fault! No wonder then that many of the parents I see in my therapy office come in feeling defensive or feeling guilty. “Did I do something wrong?” they ask me. “Did I create these issues? Is it all my fault?” My answer to this is probably […]

Breaking Free from the Prison of Intrusive Thoughts

woman in gray sweater seating on chair

Intrusive thoughts are the unwelcome, uninvited ugly thoughts that skitter through our heads now and then. Everyone has them. Think about a time when you stood on a balcony and thought, “What if I jump?” That’s an intrusive thought. (Note: Other than this example I won’t be listing other intrusive thoughts because folks who are […]

Anxiety is a Dirty Rotten Liar

grayscale photo of woman covering her face with her hands

Anxiety loves to tell lies. Anxiety likes to stand behind you and reinterpret the world in a negative way. Someone tells you that they like your shirt? Anxiety whispers in your ear, “They just feel bad for you leaving the house looking like that.” Anxiety blows it all up and makes everything worse. Anxiety is […]

Cover Emotions

One of the things that gets in the way of developing core resiliency in emotional regulation is not knowing how in the heck we actually feel.

I Can Handle It: Emotional Regulation

The entire You Are Not Your Mother membership community is built on resiliency research because I think the best thing that we can do as parents is raise our kids to be resilient. Happiness, success — those are nice goals but a whole bunch of that is out of our control. I mean, look at […]